


Longing

by FKAErinElric



Series: Cas and Dean a love story [17]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Castiel (Supernatural) Can Hear Longing, Castiel Being Castiel (Supernatural), Castiel/Dean Winchester First Kiss, Dean Winchester teaches Castiel how to kiss, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-18
Updated: 2019-05-18
Packaged: 2020-03-07 11:32:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18872344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FKAErinElric/pseuds/FKAErinElric
Summary: While Dean is busy drinking his mind wanders next thing he knows Castiel is looking at him stating he sensed his longing.Takes place in season 5 (vaguely)





	Longing

            Dean let out a long-suffering sigh as he finished off his recently poured drink. It had been a trying several months and by trying he meant terrible. He leaned back in his chair and stared at the ceiling. Sam was gone doing God knows what and here he was staring down at the end of days. His choices weighted heavy on him. The heaven squad was determined to make him Michael’s vessel. He sipped on his drink. It was a lot to take in. He was told he could beat Lucifer and save the world but it was a large burden more than he wanted to take on. Sam was to be Lucifer; he was to be Michael and he was supposed to kill his baby brother. His chest hurt. He wanted it all to stop. He wished for simpler times when he was beheading vampires and burning bones. Although he did get to meet Castiel so it wasn’t all bad.

            “Hello, Dean.”

            Dean nearly jumped out of his skin when he heard Cas’s voice. “The hell, Cas, I’m going to put a bell on your neck I swear.”

            The angel tilted his head and frowned. “I don’t understand that reference.”

            He smirked. “Didn’t think you would, Cas.” He felt the angel’s intense gaze on his skin. He shuttered. There was a weird feeling that washed over him when it came to Castiel. A forbidden not supposed to think that feeling. He chewed on his lower lip as his mind wandered to the thought of Castiel donning a bell and collar. His face heated it was kind of a hot thought. He let out a soft cough and tried to reign in his hormones. He was well aware he thought the man was attractive. He remembered when he stabbed him the second thing he noticed after the knife did nothing was how blue his eyes were. A weird thing to notice at the time but he did. He had pushed those feelings away over the months with Cas. He had told himself repeatedly that the angel was wearing some poor dude. Didn’t help matters any when Castiel was dragged back to bible camp and he actually got to meet Jimmy Novak. He frowned. He realized at that moment he like Castiel there was something about the angel that got him going and he couldn’t figure out what. Yes, it was a fairly attractive meat suit with bright big blue eyes, and messy hair that he wanted to fix but without Castiel, the man seemed less attractive. It could have been because he had a wife and kid. Dean tried to laugh to himself. Boy, Jimmy would be in for a shock if Dean made a move on Castiel. He took a drink and looked at the angel who stared at him the whole time he thought of him. He wondered if Cas could read minds. Nah, if he did surely he would have said something by now.

            “Can I offer you a drink, Cas? Or are you going to stand there and stare at me all day?” Dean asked. He poured a glass for the angel and held it out. He liked drinking with the angel even though he didn’t really get drunk.

            He took it and sat down at the table. “I am sorry, Dean. I have had a lot on mind.” He stated as he sipped his drink.

            “We all do, buddy. I assume you haven’t found God yet?”

            He shook his head. “No.”

            Dean made a sound and poured himself another drink. He felt Castiel’s intense gaze. He looked at him. He met his eyes and he was lost in them for a minute. He was sure he forgot how to breathe when he locked onto the blue orbs. If heaven personally built every human in existence then they took special care and time on Jimmy’s eyes. He sucked in a breath. His body wanted him to reach out cup his face and kiss him. _Don’t Dean_. He told himself. “So what brings you around?” He asked.

            Castiel frowned. “I thought you wanted to speak with me.”

            “Why?” He asked. He frowned at himself that sounded rude. “What made you think that?” He reworded it

            “I sensed your longing.” The angel sipped his drink as though he said something completely natural.

            Dean felt like he got punched in the gut. Cas could sense his longing? He shuttered; oh man what about all those dreams he had about the angel? He felt his face turn red. “L-longing?” He asked. He tried to drink his drink and play it off but on the inside, his stomach was in knots.

            He nodded. “Yes, I can sense human’s prayers. Or more like a sense of longing to see me. So I came.”

            He didn’t remember longing for Cas. Then again he was fairly deep in the bottle and well sometimes his body wasn’t in agreement with itself. “Well, uh, thanks I guess.”

            “I can leave.” He went to stand up.

            “No!” Dean acted first without thinking. He grabbed Castiel’s arm. “Don’t, don’t go please.”

            The angel looked at him. He tilted his head and furrowed his brow. Dean couldn’t help but think about how cute it was. “Dean, I don’t understand.” He frowned at the hand on his arm. “You have told me over and over not to get to close to you because of ‘personal space’ and yet you have ahold of my arm.”

            Dean felt a brief flash of embarrassment and fondness. He hesitantly let go of Castiel. “Sorry, I just… guess I wanted to…”

            He raised an eyebrow. “Dean,” He sighed. He sounded aggravated. “We have tasks we have to do. I need to find God I do not have time to sit around and drink with you and watch your face turn an odd red color.” He tilted his head. “Is that why you longed for me? Are you ill?” He reached out to rest his fingers on Dean’s forehead.

            Dean didn’t get a chance to say anything as those fingers touched his head. He felt his face grow warm and he watched Castiel.

            The angel closed his eyes as if he was searching for something. Dean feared that Castiel would find something anything that hinted to his less than pure thoughts on him. Castiel frowned as he kept his hand on him. “I do not detect any illness. However, you seem to have elevated levels of oxytocin.” He removed his fingers.

            Dean felt his heart flutter as Castiel stared at him.

            He frowned again and it was the cutest thing that Dean had ever seen. “I still sense a longing for me.” He tilted his head

            _Shit_. Dean thought. He smirked. “Well, what can I say, Cas, I really like your company.”

            Castiel got closer to him and Dean felt his heart pound in his chest. The hunter thought for a minute that Castiel might kiss him but the angel just sniffed the air around him.

            “The hell are you doing?” Dean exclaimed as he backed away. “What are you a dog?”

            “No, I’m a wavelength of celestial intent. I told you that before. You are emitting strange energy.” He stepped near him again

            Dean let out a yelp and backed himself against the wall. Drinks were forgotten about. Now he was up against the wall with a six-foot tall angel in front of him. “I uh, what?”

            He frowned. “I have never seen this before. It’s interesting.” He stared at him. “I sensed it from you before around Anna… but this time it’s different.”

            He felt like he was being analyzed. “Look, buddy, maybe you should back off and,”

            Castiel grabbed Dean’s arm and gave him another sniff. Dean felt his skin perk up. The angel’s actions were weird but what was even weirder was that Dean almost found it to be a turn on. “Arousal. That’s what it is. I haven’t seen it in a human in a while.” Castiel looked at him his big blue eyes full of understanding but Dean was not sure if he got the whole picture. “Odd. That doesn’t explain the overwhelming sense of longing you are emitting for me.” He held his hand to his face and looked over Dean.

            Dean frowned. How can someone be as old as Castiel and be that dense? He went to speak he was going to clear it up. He had words on the end of his tongue. He had two choices lie and say he was looking at porn and that was why he was aroused or tell him he wanted to know what was under that coat.

            Suddenly Castiel’s blue eyes flickered with a brief flash of embarrassment and understanding. “Ah, I see. You are aroused by me.” He nodded.

            He blushed and sighed. “Cas,” He shook his head. He could deny it but Castiel could sense it so no lying would cover it. “Leave it to an angel to turn arousal and attraction into something unsexy.”

            “I am sorry.” He frowned and stared at Dean with his piercing blue gaze. “Does my vessel bother you? Do you wish me to get another one?”

            He shook his head. “No, I uh, like your vessel.”

            He nodded. “But I had thought that you only liked females.”

            He sighed. It was true Castiel had only seen him flirt with women. He rubbed the back of his neck. “Listen some humans… sometimes like the same gender.”

            “Bisexual yes I know if it. I have watched Earth for a long time, Dean.”

            “Oh, well…” He trailed off. He was completely embarrassed. He shrugged. “Now you know, Cas, I think you’re hot.”

            “I am sorry I presence arouses you.” He looked away and Dean was pretty sure he saw him blush.

            “No, I mean, it’s fine, Cas, I can’t control it you know.”

            “I know. But I can pick a different vessel. If that’s what you desire?”

            “That is not what I want.” He sighed. “Have you really not noticed before?”

            “I had sensed it a few times but here recently… it was more intense.” He ran his hand through his black hair. “Lots of things have been more intense recently… since my resurrection.”

            Dean frowned. He had been saddened by Castiel’s then death but tickled to death when he returned to him. “So you did notice.”

            “I’ve noticed a lot since Jimmy went to heaven. This is the first time I no longer have the echo of a human soul in my head. I’m alone in here and I can feel things I haven’t before.”

            “Wait what do you mean since Jimmy went to heaven?”

            “When Raphael killed me it killed him as well. A human soul does not survive something like that.”

            He frowned. “Poor Jimmy. So you are alone in there?”

            “That is what I said, Dean. You do not listen well.” He crossed his arms. “And since then my feelings have been overwhelming. I do not have a soul to buffer them. It’s strange like pieces of Jimmy are still in here. I feel like a need and want for things. It’s brief usually.” He sighed. “Since I fell it’s gotten worse. I’m becoming more human-like.”

            “You say that like it’s a bad thing.” He studied Castiel’s face. He felt a sense of joy that Castiel was in there alone now. If he acted on his feelings he wouldn’t feel like he was forcing himself on Jimmy. He watched as Castiel looked at him then looked away thoughtful as if wondering if it was a bad thing.

            “It’s unusual; unnatural for an angel to feel this way. No wonder I have fallen.” He gave a sad smile. “But, if I am going to be human…” He trailed off and Dean saw his face redden.

            Dean went to say something but words were cut off when Castiel pushed him against the wall. Flesh against him their chest was together. Dean went to protest he wasn’t sure why maybe the last few strains of himself fighting for normalcy. Castiel pressed his chapped lips against his. He didn’t close his eyes, their noses bumped, and honestly, it was a piss poor attempt at a kiss.

            Castiel backed away. “There now we have shared a kiss.”

            “You call that a kiss?” Dean asked with a frown. “Dude, that’s not how you kiss haven’t you seen a movie before?”

            “What does that have to do with kissing? I have seen humans do it before. It’s an act of placing lips on lips.”

            Dean sighed. He grabbed his shoulders and pulled him forward. “I’ll show you how it’s done. First, close your eyes,”

            “Then how will I see how it’s done?” he asked as he closed his eyes.

            He rolled his eyes. He grabbed Castiel’s face and tilted it. “Hold your head like this or else your nose will get in the way.” He shook his head. His nose throbbed somewhat from where they had bumped into each other. “Now move your lips when I kiss you.” He leaned in and tried not to laugh as he could tell Castiel was going through the steps. He pressed his lips to Castiel’s and briefly thought about getting the angel chapstick the next time he was in a store. He heard the other man make a noise of agreement. He smiled in the kiss and Castiel tilted his head. There the angel was getting it. He flicked his tongue on Castiel’s lips and by some miracle, the angel understood as he opened his mouth. The kiss continued for a while as their tongues wrestled back and forth. Dean finally pushed him away Castiel looked up at him his face an expression of hurt. “I need to breath.”

            He nodded. He breathed as well though Dean was pretty sure the angel didn’t need to. “Was that satisfactory?”

            He laughed. “Best damn kiss I’ve had in years.” He looked at the angel whose hair was more messed up from Dean running his hands in it. His lips swollen from the kiss. Castiel placed his fingers to his lips and lightly touched them. “You need some chapstick though.” Dean said with a chuckle.

            “My lips tingle.” Castiel looked down at his hand then at Dean. “My heart is pounding and…” He looked down at his crotch area and Dean felt himself blush. “I have never felt this before.”

            Dean smirked. “Did you like it?” He felt unsure. He felt like he was corrupting an angel but then again he had shown the angel alcohol, and the angel did fall for him. Would making out with an angel give him a first class ticket to Hell?

            Castiel looked at Dean. Their eyes met, their gaze was intense. Castiel’s Adam’s apple bobbed as he spoke. “Yes, Dean, very much so.” He reached out and creased Dean’s face then stopped. "I'm sorry I know personal space.” He went to move his hand and Dean laid his hand on top of his.

            “Personal space be damned. Dude, we just kissed. You can lay a hand on me.” He stroked Dean’s face and Dean smiled. He liked it a lot. “Cas,” Dean started.

            “Dean, can we… does this…” he looked away then back at him. “I am unfamiliar with human customs but does this mean we are coupled?”

            He laughed at his wording and noticed how Castiel shrunk away from him. “No, I’m not laughing at that. It was how you said it. If you… what to be coupled I don’t mind.”

            Castiel smiled a gummy smile that Dean had never seen him do before. He took Dean’s hand and gave it a kiss. “This has been most educational but I have to continue my hunt for God. I will see you later, Dean.”

            Dean was standing there alone. He huffed out a sigh and finished his drink. He had to be careful about his thinking about Castiel now that he knew the angel could sense it. He touched his lips. Yeah, he was defiantly going to get Cas some chapstick.


End file.
